meesa315

I am now incredibely excited and incredibely sad that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows( or whatever the title was) is coming out July 21st. I'm excited to read the end. but really sad that its going to be over. I'm hoping the book is approximately 10000000000000000 pages long. I'll settle for 800. As long as its not below 600.
And the movie comes out July 13th I think? So who's going to be partying hard for harry that week with me?

And did anyone else see pictures of him from that play Equus?
Here's the link 'cause I'm lazy.
http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2007/01/things_that_mak.html

where have all the romantic comedies gone?

Well. I know who my real friends and who aren't my real friends so why do I get so annoyed?
At least I know I have friendships where equal effort is put in. Its still frustrating when its not. And when people are stupid.

Sophia!!

I miss you. We should do something together. Basically anything. Brekkie? Movie?

In other news: My ultimate team rocks. We got second at the last two tournaments losing to club teams (like pro teams) in the finals. So we're undefeated against college teams.
And I feel like crap right now and I'm supposed to go to practice...but I'm going home instead. Yay home!

I can't wait until thanksgiving

I don't think I've ever had a guy pursue me. There are guys who have liked me but I put more effort into it.
New Plan: put in no effort

I feel like something has been missing from my life lately and I pinpointed it.
I'm missing testosterone. In the form of male friends. I think. I just haven't been hanging out with guys at all, just girls. So maybe that's it.
Maybe not.

So he is making it easier for me to stop liking him. But he's also making it easy for me to stop liking him as a person. Which makes me sad. And pissed off. And wanting me to punch him in his face(but I would never do this because I'm not a violent, grudge-holding, spiteful person)
Well I knew worst case scenario was super-awkward not being friends anymore. And it looks like that's the direction its taking. goodbye year long friendship.
we'll see what happensin a couple months

The weather is starting to make me feel like myself again.
I hate summer.

Hmm, only three hours late. Oh well.

Eww Jose just touched my hair as he walked by me on the computer at work..
And earlier today Alison hit me in the butt with a stick and Jose was like 'do it again!!'
and he tried to get me to dance to Shakira earlier today.
Creeeeeeeeepy.

I'm done with work in a week though! And then I get 10 days before school starts. sweet.

I got invited to dinner with some people I sort of play ultimate with and also to go see Beerfest with them. The list of people going to the movie was a who's who of Under 22 Seattle elite Ultimate players and I wondered, what happens to a person if they quit playing ultimate? Do they still hang out with their old elite friends?
And what would happen if I quit? Would I lose the friends I've made on ultimate?
That doesn't matter right now.

That's it. If I ever write a screenplay its going to be about this job.
I'm thinking...tv show.

do people only start dating when the two parties get drunk?

wtf. people. wtf.

(I'm thinking of several examples right now. Although I can probably think of many more examples that don't make sense.

because the wedding mix got depressing
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oldies + warm weather = love

love of anything. life, people, boys, friends, ultimate, ice cream, lake washington, decisions

I haven't felt much like love lately. Too many important decisions, confusing signals, decisions and decisions.

I think I might live with the frisbee girls in the house, I just need to talk to them about it and check out the house.

I think...I know what I'm doing. I will wait. Waiting is death, but I'll only be waiting a couple more weeks. I just pray that it works out for me, even if I'm not chosen.

RIP Albert Bickeboeller
I couldn't cry. I just want to sleep. I think that's how I deal with grief. My dad said that my grandma was doing well, I think she almost started crying on the phone though. I'm just glad he's no longer in pain. One less Bickeboeller in the world.

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So I woke up, went to classes, took a Chem Midterm(it did not rape me), went to Biology. Really wasn't feeling it in Biology so I decided to leave. This ended up being extremely fortuitous since I had forgotten to do a prelab due at 12:30. Rushed the pre-lab, started working on what turns out to be the lab report from hell.
I got hungry, so I decided to go in search of lunch in the form of subway in the HUB. I carry my delicious sandwich to the Quad which is INSANE.
There are people everywhere, a trampoline set up and girls bouncing. People doing flips. The bluegrassers playing. People sleeping. People cuddling. People studying. PACKED. I spot Greg from the B-team in the distance with a disc. I move closer and there are various mens/womens ultimate players(including Niki from my team). I enjoy my sandwich. During this time Jack/Susan shows up along with Chris/Conan. I join in on the throwing. Jenny-who is a wonderful Canadian from my team- shows up and we toss for a while. Pretty soon our circle of throwing breaks up as people leave and us girls start "studying"
We lie in the grass. Jenny and I are wearing jeans and we both say at the same time "my legs are on fire..."
And hence the perfect idea was born: to find a body of water
And thus our quest to jump into Lake Washington begins.
We rush to the dorms to find clothes and start walking down to the WAC(Waterfront Activities Center). We spot a perfect dock slightly south of where you get the canoes and we jump in! It was really refreshing and fun with the girls I was with. Then we laid out our towels on the dock and just relaxed in the sun talking about boys(coincidentally all ultimate boys)


And then things got really exciting.
a fairly large boat pulls up containing enormous men and their beer. I overhear them talking about Coach Willingham. We decide they must be UW football players.
One yells at us "Hey, want to ride on our boat?
I reply, no thanks.

A minute passes.

"Hey, want to ride on our boat?'
Niki replies: no thanks.

We decide to leave. As we're leaving a guy sitting by a building near the dock says:
"You guys decided not to go for a ride? probalby a wise decision. the way they were asking you guys sounded like they were trying to get a dog on a boat..."
We walk back to campus, realizing we've been irresponsible with homework. Decide to go hang out in the quad anyways. Shomir gets the blugrass guys to play us a song because "You could be playing to one, two, three, four, five hot chicks!" And that was really great.
Then I did homework, ate dinner with the boys on my floor and Laine, then went to work out at the IMA, which went really well.
At practice it was pretty tough but I think my foot is basically healed in time for regionals! Afterwards we relaxed for five minutes and visualized then made a birthday spank tunnel for Hannah.
Now I need to 1) finish my lab report 2) shower 3) fetch laundry 4)prelab for tomorrow 5) SLEEP

Tomorrow after lab I don't really have anything else to do this week outside of classes, so its going to be amazing!

idiot got alcohol poisoning.

sweet

bonjourhappylion: so is aaron ok?
slystrategist: haha, ya, hes fine
haha, very funny. I see so much humor in this whole situation.

oh wait.

why are people so selfish?
assholes...
thanks for totally blowing me off and not checking whether I was actually there two days in a row. Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you for caring.
so much.
Thank you for caring so much about your alcohol.

and yet you still don't want to go to the fundraising party for ultimate? logical...

now that I'm slightly removed from my breakdown yesterday
I kept thinking since tuesday, I have to study, I have to power through. I have to study for chem, I have to get through the horrible chem test(it felt like all kinds of sexual assault...as ultimate megan would say..and a guy in my math class actually said), I have to study for math. I have to not have a birthday. I have to go to sprint workout and then practice. I have to ignore my friends drinking. I have to just get through. Power through. I knew I could do it well if I totally put my emotions aside. But then I got to thinking, do I really want to do what I need to do completely succeed? If I put my sadness aside I could have studied more(as I thought after the chem test), but without emotion what would I be- not human. To ignore those emotions would be to ignore my humanity, and to pretend that it didn't matter to me, when it really does matter to me a lot. So I guess I didn't do as best as I could do, and I did break down a couple times. But I was able to get through it moderately well. And I was able to do it feeling human. Feeling weak at times. Not pushing my grief out of my head, pretending like it doesn't matter, like she didn't matter. So yeah. I got through it, I'm glad those two days were behind me.


* And thank you everyone for calling me or talking to me online or sending me messages wishing me a Happy Birthday and their condolences. It really helped me get through an awful Birthday and now that I'm out the other side I feel much better. *



Now I have to get out my annoyances at my dorm friends, some of them at least. A month ago the girls were all anti-drinking(not julie..but she just doesn't really drink that often and never to get drunk, just with family dinners). They had never had alcohol in their life. But all of a sudden its switched and I'm suddenly the prude. I'm not even really against people drinking, I just don't. But I didn't need all my dorm friends to suddenly convert from non-drinkers to drinkers, and trying to get me to join in, in the span of two of the hardest weeks for me to get through in my life. They all partied it up last night, and tried to get me to join them. No I don't drink. No I have to study for a final. No, this is the worst time for me to be consuming alcohol because I'll just end up feeling worse. And then this morning they bitch about it to me after I'd been up three or four hours, taken a test(which I think I did well on!) and cleaned up. Her stomach hurt- she complained. Aww, too bad. I told her it was her own fault, and she blamed it on her last shot that a guy "made" her drink. Poor baby. She also said it wasn't really from the alcohol since she didn't have a headache. Ugh. The last two weeks I've just wanted to close my door, lock it, and keep all the dorm people at bay until next quarter when I'm of a sunnier disposition. Oh dorms.
I need to decide where I want to live next year....

worst test I've ever taken in my life.
Thank you Dr. Robinson.
Not that it really matters...it just would have been nice to feel like a failure in chem today